Whatever Happened to Pizza at McDonald's
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Whatever Happened to Pizza at McDonald's
This is a podcast about whatever happened to pizza at McDonald's.
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392 एपिसोडहरू
376 - A Windfall
After working as a personal butler to a deranged, elderly former actress, I inherit her fortune upon her untimely death and use it to procure a commun...

375 - Forgiving Satan
In a follow-up to last week's episode, I question my favorite prayer hotline about why they hung up on me for asking if God and Satan could "bury the...

374 - RIPizza, Ozzy Osbourne
I would like to induct the pioneering pizza enthusiast Mr. Ozzy Osbourne into my celebrity hall of fame, but hesitate to do so on account of he worshi...

373 - McPizza Bites
Our Canadian deputy journalist files a report on his country's "new" McPizza Bites, which are part of McDonald's Canada's crime-glorifying Internation...

372 - Pool Boy
After a long hiatus wherein I was evicted from my New York City apartment and hitchhiked across the United States to return to Los Angeles, I detail t...

371 - Slop
My thoughts on the election of the latest pope are put on hold as I deal with a copyright dispute concerning the unauthorized use of my image in a You...

370 - College of Cardinals
I examine Cardinal Pizzaball's potential competition in the race to become the next pope. Plus, I discuss updates on the matter of last year's assassi...

369 - Farewell, The Pope
I wish a fond farewell to Pope Francis, a.k.a. The Pope, and ruminate on the notion that his passing away might have something to do with my placing U...

368 - A Special Announcement / Notice
After careful consideration of various crimes committed by the United States presidential administration, and with my role as a citizen as well as an...

367 - Group Chat
I solicit help from above in my quest to be accidentally added to a group chat discussing top secret McDonald's secrets.

366 - Adult Babies
I show support for McDonald's adult-oriented menu items (like pizza) by donning a costume to purchase the new Minecraft adult Happy Meal.

365 - Facial Recognition
I attempt to trick McDonald's new artificial intelligence facial recognition technology by wearing a rubber fright mask of comedian/talent judge Howar...

364 - Priest Chat
In my pursuit to join the College of Cardinals so that I might cast a vote for a pizza-friendly pope, I chat online with a friendly priest from Priest...

363 - Pope Pizzaballa I
With the current pope in ill health, I pursue the possibility of joining the College of Cardinals so that I might cast a vote for the next pope: Pope...

362 - DOGE
In an attempt to gain better access to government records regard McDonald's Pizza matters (whatever happened to it, etc.), I seek to join the Departme...

361 - Plastic Poisoning
Research on Reddit.com leads me to question whether McDonald's stopped serving pizza because too many people were eating the plastic tray on which is...

360 - Altoona-Style Pizza, Part 3
On the conclusion of an epic 3-part saga concerning the horrific Altoona-style pizza, I share the results of my accidental plastic consumption with th...

359 - Altoona-Style Pizza, Part 2
On the advice of the Kraft corporation, I contact the reference desk at my local public library to determine whether I am in bodily danger from having...

358 - Altoona-Style Pizza, Part 1
I detail the shocking horror of Altoona-style pizza and suffer my own intestinal mishap in the process.

357 - New Year Predictions
I contact a professional psychic to answer some questions regarding what to expect in the new year vis-à-vis the potential return of certain fast food...

356 - Christmas 2024
I lament the largely negative impact on my life of sharing a name with a health insurance CEO who was forced to pass away in an act of vigilante justi...

355 - Coincidences
I explore the many disturbing coincidences between my investigative journalism program (or IJP) and the assassination of a lesser-known and, frankly,...

354 - Emergency Live Broadcast
In light of the assassination of another Brian Thompson very near my home, I go into hiding in one of New York City's most central parks and update my...

353 - Thanksgiving Turkey Giveaway
To celebrate American Thanksgiving, I plan to generously give away turkeys with cavities full of educational literature.

352 - The Deep State
In an effort to broaden my outreach, I appear as a special guest on a popular conservative radio show to discuss my concerns about the deep state's co...

351 - Brain Enhancer
After a political realignment, I explore the possibility of accepting advertising dollars from a nootropics company. But a brain enhancement pill acci...

350 - Election Concern
In part two of a special two-part event (and my record-breaking 350th episode), I am once again experiencing election anxiety, exactly as I did eight...

349 - Devil Dog
On part one of a special two-part event, I have named my new dog. But concern about his love of a devilish Halloween pet costume causes me to seek spi...

348 - E. Coli
I adopt a dog to aid me in my investigations. Plus, I look into a recent outbreak of E. Coli at McDonald's by mailing a laboratory a hamburger.

347 - Assembling a Uniform
In preparation for my upcoming role as United States Pizza Czar, I assemble a uniform with the help of Brooks Brothers and the fine folks at Gorilla G...

346 - Moles
While investigating the ongoing case of whether Kamala Harris really worked at McDonald's, I unfortunately break a cardinal rule of journalism by send...

345 - An End to Violence
I give God Ben-David one more chance to answer my prayers by pleading with Him to remove violence from the hearts of humanity before I become a major...

344 - Resume Help
I investigate reports that Kamala Harris did not, in fact, work at McDonald's. In the process, I update my resume.

343 - Journalist No More?
In light of recent McDonald's-related developments in presidential politics, I consider giving up my status as a journalist to become a government lac...

342 - Vice Presidential Service
While investigating reports that Vice President Kamala Harris may have worked at McDonald's, I seek valuable intelligence from another fast food chain...

341 - Mea Culpa
While visiting the White House to lobby "lame duck" President Biden on passing executive action related to the McDonald's Pizza matter, I suffer an em...

340 - Neck Noodle
After a Hawaiian Breeze-scented oil explosion forces me to take several baths, my fingers become so pruny that my home security is put at risk.

339 - Medical Update
After last week's electrocution incident, I update the Glade Plugins medical department on my recent doctor's visit and receive some startling disinfo...

338 - Cease and Desist
My award-pending investigative series Sériàlle comes to an abrupt end, when I am threatened with legal action by a major local New York newspaper.

337 - Sériàlle, Episode 5
My investigation into mysterious McDonald's Pizza matters in Canada leads me to a floating McDonald's in Vancouver which once played host to a team of...